We often talk of having an instant gratification society, but what does this really mean and how does your impatience get in the way of the desires you’d like to manifest?
The Cycle of Desire
The cycle of desire starts when we first become aware of a desire: an object, person, experience or event we would like to manifest in our reality.
When we first decide we want something, it’s with a mixture of excitement and trepidation… we’re excited and hopeful that we will achieve our aim, curious and nervous about what our lives will look like when we achieve our aim, and often afraid that we won’t achieve our goal, or that we somehow don’t deserve to have it realize.
But we’re human and hope springs eternal, and so the desire is launched.
At first you can manage the waiting, because discernment takes time. You need to have options shown to you, reject or accept them, keep putting your intentions out and keep refining the details of what you specifically want.
This is where it tends to get tricky though, because this process of refinement can take weeks, months and even years, depending on the magnitude of your desired aim.
The process of refinement may also lead you to discover that you no longer desire this aim, or that you desire a different aim. At this point you can exit the cycle and launch a new goal from your whole new platform of desire.
If you stick with it long enough though, with persistence, perseverance, tenacity, resilience and dedication, you can most likely achieve any aim you set for yourself. From here, once you’ve achieved your aim, you usually go on to launch a whole new level of desire.
Discernment, Delay, Denial & Instant Gratification
The problem for most of us arises in the discernment stage – if we are delayed long enough, we end up feeling like we’ve been denied.
Our natural impatience here stems from the fact that subconsciously we KNOW we are creators, made in the image of God, and ergo anything we desire should manifest immediately.
The impatience we feel is exacerbated by the society we live in: fast food, fast cars, fast relationships, one-night stands and disposable everything. We’re so used to having everything delivered to us at the push of a button, that anything that takes a while to realize makes us feel like we are being deprived and denied.
In short order, feeling deprived and denied will escalate into feeling rejected, unwanted and unloved – and so we take action to avoid those feelings: we go for the instant gratification. Screw the discernment; we grab the very first thing that comes along that could be molded into fitting our criteria, and we claim it as our own.
At first we can usually convince ourselves that we’re happy, that we’re willing to lower our standards and settle for less… but the discernment and rejection process you’ve habituated your body into won’t settle for that: I mean how can you create an instant habit of accepting wholly something that you would have rejected five minutes ago? It creates internal conflict in you.
So the doubts creep in and you begin to question your decision and your choice, often deciding to walk away from the instant gratification quick fix you accepted in place of what you really desire.
Pride & Self Worth
At this stage of the fight, you’re often feeling lonely and rejected because now you have the added weight of a ‘failure’ to deal with.
I mean if this is what you manifested, obviously this must be what the Universe thinks you’re worth. Your ego, which has a vested interest in keeping you feeling low and downhearted, makes this all about your worth and doesn’t let you take personal responsibility for it.
As soon as you take responsibility, you’re in the driving seat and your ego is no longer in control. You take responsibility by seeing that the lack of achievement was caused by your acceptance of the instant gratification – you’re unhappy because you exited the cycle too early.
So your Ego does everything in its power to make you feel low: reminding you of all the other times you didn’t get what you want, pointing out every flaw in you, every problem in your life… until eventually you sit down and decide to give up, because obviously ‘the Universe never wants anything good to happen for you’.
The alternative to collapsing in a little heap in the corner and pitying yourself is to refocus on your goal and enter the process of discernment and delay again.
Alternately you can release the desire, let go of the unresolved emotion and launch a whole new desire based on your current level of understanding – one that is much more aligned with who you are, what you really want and how much you are willing to do to achieve it.