How my mind works and how much I actually see

So if the fact that I have incredible insight into stuff scares you about me, then you will probably be positively petrified by the end of this post. Probably best to stop reading now LOL

However…. I challenged an ALDG member to stretch himself enormously. This member was anti-Trump and managed to find ten positive things to say about Trump as part of a forgiveness and acceptance lesson. I truly respect that kind of stretch.

In order to create a safe space for this seeker to express himself, I offered to stretch myself equally by posting something that makes me uncomfortable.

I do this regularly, exchanging pieces of information about myself and my journey to show seekers that they can safely reveal themselves.

The weirdness of what we deal with means that people are often scared to verbalize their experiences for fear of being grandiose, delusional and insane - or having others think that they are. Sharing my experience and offering an equal return means that clients just have to follow my lead - they don’t have to take all the responsibility.

So this is that post that stretches me and makes me uncomfortable :)

Why does this post make me uncomfortable to do?

It’s the whole spirituality, humility and arrogance ego thing.

If you show your knowledge or speak form a place of knowledge, then people label you arrogant and know-it-all because often they feel less intelligent than you.

I already have difficulty with people thinking I’m too smart, too much, too fast, too know-it-all, too arrogant…. to show how fast my mind actually works and how quickly I see stuff therefore, runs the risk of being seen as boastful and prideful. People tend to think you are rubbing stuff in their faces.

You see it in experiences like you go along and just offer your thought or comment on a post or conversation - and you get accused of "telling people they’re stupid" and "spiritual oneupmanship". Huh? That was just what I thought immediately.

Or you get situations like the one where I was accused of being arrogant and opinionated because I share my articles that are published on mainstream media platforms. The person had never clicked through on any of the links to understand it - they’d just decided I was arrogant because I was posting so much stuff. But to be fair, I can get multiple articles published daily, and every now and then I have writing bursts where I do do it. I think of it as marketing.

By that standard, the fact that I haven’t been distributing to media the last while could also be seen as growing arrogance…. but actually it’s because my articles are so stolen, plagiarized and published that I’m trying to find a solution to help me gain better control over my content.

I have author collections on sites I’ve never heard of and can you show hundreds of examples where people have taken my content and just put their name to it, or have rewritten my content into another article. The volume is staggering actually, and it’s concerning because it doesn’t offer me the marketing turnaround I need.

Likewise my requests to keep contact in the public areas unless you’re a paying client. First of all, how dare I charge for anything I do - everything from God should be free and given freely. I have no right to demand payment for any of my services apparently, and get attacked as being unspiritual because I expect people to pay for one on one sessions and work.

Secondly the time spent - if I spend five minutes with 100 people in messages a day, that’s 500 minutes. That’s 8 hours plus a day. Message exchanges usually take in excess of an hour or two - and people expect that that time must be given to them. Can I just help with this, explain that, heal this, pray for them… if I answered all the messages and engaged I would have no time left for anything else. That doesn’t make me arrogant - it makes me efficient.

Likewise being told I’m "not God"…. this is my favorite. You’re quickly demoted from spiritual genius to arrogant and not-God the moment somebody disagrees with you or you won’t give them what they want. And I’m the Queen of Pissing People’s Egos Off…. people write articles about me and start groups to discredit me. I am aware that it’s happening and it’s the price of the journey I chose… Jesus was so disliked they nailed him to a cross. After publicly torturing him. People stood and cheered while it happened.

But apparently being okay with it makes me arrogant…. sigh. Actually it makes me scared, but I am committed to doing whatever God asks of me. My job is to make sure that the fear doesn’t stop me from acting when God commands me.

So in a nutshell, I expect trolls to go nuts with this one - and to stretch myself just that little bit more, I am going to post this to groups where I know the people attack quickly and lash out as well. I’m going to take the full force of this blow today to stretch myself in a big way.

Call it arrogant if you want…. it’s still training to me ;)

So how much do I really see and how fast does my mind work?

I get asked this a lot…. often by people saying things like “what makes you think you’re so smart?” and “stop assuming things about me."

How I’m going to illustrate how much I see is by giving you a brief comment that someone made on a post I did about vaccines a few days ago.

I will give you what the commenter said, what they meant, and the immediate insights I had and could scribble down in the space of two or three minutes. I see and saw more, but the list can’t be endless. I’ll never stop typing and you’ll never stop reading.

I stopped myself at an A4 page of notes of insights. I’m not going to explain each insight in explicit detail. This is more about showing the volume of what I see.

The comment gist (not verbatim) was:

"That stupid Jenny McCarthy! What does she know anyway! She has no medical training."

What the commenter meant was:

Jenny McCarthy, most well known as a glamor model and comedy actress, and dated Jim Carey if I remember, has used her celebrity to speak out against vaccines publicly. Her mission began when her son was diagnosed with autism, and Jenny came to believe that the vaccinations he’d received were the cause of his autism. Since then, Jenny has been vocally active in media as a spokesperson against vaccination and its potential dangers. Jenny is the lesser-known cousin of comedy actress Melissa McCarthy.

The insights I immediately had about the person I was engaging with:

* You assume that everyone is like you because you offered no detail about who Jenny McCarthy was or how she fit into the picture; so you’re assuming everyone has the same general knowledge as you and consumes the same info.

* You don’t know what paradigm blindness is. If you did you would explain more background in a comment like that. You don’t yet understand that there are always multiple points of view and levels of information, and that people don’t always know stuff. You have little writing experience, because even junior writers quickly pick up that they need to put in a little bit of background information when introducing a thread.

* You consume media regularly as you are aware of what she is doing. This speaks to lower vibration because many journeyers evolve into news fasts and complete media blackouts. Jenny McCarthy is not mainstream news, and often appears under entertainment news, even for her activism work. It’s like the tabloids follow Angelina Jolie’s humanitarian work. In order to get to entertainment news, you either have consumed your fill of mainstream news, or you go straight to what the celebrities are doing in order to gather info. So you’re either a news hog or you only care about celebrity culture.

* This also tells us you value celebrities, celebrity culture, fame - and you believe these are indicators of intelligence and wisdom. You look at what these celebrities are doing to inform the opinions you come to about life and the world.

* You follow trends and entertainment content and wait for information to come to you. If you had done any research on your own, you would have focused on other parts of content too. Instead you only focused on Jenny McCarthy, which is not necessarily the kind of content you would have come to when researching vaccines. Jenny’s approach works BECAUSE the PR strategy is to inject that content into another platform - I’ve built PR strategies on this model. Most Jenny McCarthy info falls under entertainment news and is push content, designed to keep young mothers interested on entertainment sites. They don’t want to lose you as a reader just because you’re having a baby. So they add some content for you to feel less guilty - you learned more about being a mom; you don’t have to feel guilty for sitting on an entertainment website now.

* You believe what is happening in media, because you believe others do the same. How do we know this? Your comment presupposes that Jenny McCarthy’s activism campaign IS having an impact. That she IS reaching people.

* You buy into the system’s structure of social classes and in particular the class of celebrity.

* You value formal education. Why else would her medical education matter? You’re the kind of person who ends a debate or thread with a statement like “there is no scientific proof.” This further expands into external validation - it’s not enough for you if a person learns about it, they must have credentials and others must agree in order for anything to be valid.

* You believe that facts can only be proven by science. And you believe there is a separation between science and religion.

* You do not yet understand that increased knowledge comes automatically at a higher vibration.

* You are afraid of voicing a dissenting opinion. You believe people can look stupid by voicing an opinion others disagree with.

* If someone disagrees with you, you believe that the label “stupid" applies. If you disagree with someone, you believe that the label “stupid" applies. This tells me you’re much more likely to attack the person than the point. Arguments with you will get very personal, very quickly.

* You base your debates on opinions and not facts. You do not research topics - you find something to blame out of what you already know about the situation. Anything Jenny McCarthy says is immediately invalidated by her lack of medical education in your mind. So this also means that you automatically disagree with anything she says and must defend your viewpoint against “stupid" people.

* It didn’t occur to you that people may be pro Jenny McCarthy…. you voiced a strong opinion expecting others to agree. Paradigm blindness again.

* You believe that anger is a valid response when you disagree with something. And that it’s okay to attack the identity on a personal level, demeaning and belittling the person.

* You are way more focused on people than patterns and your own lessons. You often project blame most likely. It’s easy to extrapolate that you use projection of blame as a technique to avoid taking responsibility and doing the work. If you were someone who did the work, you’d have researched other facts. Possibly found all the reasons why Jenny McCarthy is right.

* You want to make an impact on the world. You are mimicking Jenny’s attacking style in order to achieve reach because you want to be like her. She has clearly achieved something you want.

* If you feel inferior, you will discredit those around you in order to reduce them, because their appearance of inferiority restores the balance of superiority that you want to feel. In one short comment, you said “she’s stupid” and “she’s uneducated”. You reinforced it, looking for agreement, with “what does she know”. This also shows that you believe that people will easily complain and prefer to do so - it was your way of trying to elicit agreement with the statement.

* You believe that lack of education invalidates a person’s worth. So you’re either educated and feel superior to those who are not, or you are uneducated and feel inferior as a result. You probably believe that you have to put money aside for your kids’ education and if they don’t go to college they are doomed.

* You see medicine and science as facts, crucial and achievements in humanity. It would only be a problem that she lacks scientific medical knowledge, if that knowledge has worth in your mind; if you’ve given it a position of value. You assign medicine higher status than human rights, freedom of speech, freedom of choice, freedom of religion, freedom to be healthy. The right to choose vaccines, or not, is religious, health based, belief based and a human rights issue. Everyone is allowed their soap box - America is built on those principles and have made this a worldwide issue and right.

* You lack healing understanding because there are basic principles that make vaccines a normal area of concern for most seekers and journeyers.

* You don’t believe you have an opinion or information of worth to add to the conversation. The post was about the pattern of habituation to illness that vaccines create - you had a plethora of content to contribute. But you chose only to discredit and insult Jenny McCarthy. Your post could have been as long or as short as you wanted, and you could have focused on anything. But you said nothing that came from you, except a projection of lack of worth onto Jenny McCarthy. To me you may as well have been screaming: "I have no value. I don’t have anything to offer. Look at someone else and see how bad they are so I can run away from the spotlight." You probably handle the spotlight and confrontation very badly. I can imagine fights get rather heated and you will resort to physical attack if pushed far enough. You hate feeling cornered. You also battle to restrain your impulse control and often blurt stuff out.

* You believe you have right of say and that your opinion matters, so you want to tell the people doing it how it should be done. Or at least what is wrong with they way they are approaching it. You do this in order to avoid taking responsibility for doing stuff yourself. You use blame to avoid everything. Also you will jump in without understanding stuff - it’s complex to do something like activism work and you have to know your Ps & Qs - especially if you are going to garner coverage. You also face backlash and trolls and attacks. If you’d done something of this complexity before, you’d do a bit of research before you knock the way people approach stuff in media. Controversy is a tool. Jenny McCarthy would not still be doing this years later if it was having no effect and there was no traction. She’s a smart lady - don’t let the blond hair fool you. It takes SERIOUS skill and lack of ego to do proper comedy acting.

So this is just a portion of what I would see immediately… LOL, don’t say I didn’t warn you. I could go on with this list for a long time, and I’ve been very brief above.

Deep breath…. big stretch…. and POST!

Love & light always xo


PS… this post is 2814 words long. It is a first draft and has only had a couple of read throughs for copyediting. It comes in at a Grade 7 for readability. It took me 40 minutes to complete. And I took my time with it.

I am NOT joking even slightly when I say that you get so fucking smart on this journey that you’re gonna make Einstein look like a beginner.

Stop focusing on trying to make the smart people look stupid, and instead focus on catching up. #justsaying

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