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Life Coaches Toolbox by Chemory Gunko

Apology Statement Generator

💠 TRUST BUILDING - APOLOGIES, FORGIVENESS & AMENDS 💠

An Apology Statement Generator to help you craft a proper apology, so that you don't forget what you want to say, or forget to cover important things that should be said.

  Apology Statement Generator

When you'd like to apologize, ask for forgiveness or make amends, you often have the right intentions, but somehow the words get all jumbled up.

This tool is designed to help you get all the facts and fears out of your system before you have this crucial conversation, leaving you with a list of statements you can use when having the conversation.

This way, even though your palms may be sweating and your stomach tied up in knots, you won't forget anything you have to say, or get thrown off course by overwhelming fear and emotion in the moment.

Instructions for the Apology Statement Generator


Instructions for the Apology Statement Generator

The apology statement generator works kind of like a backwards form... but instead of picking which statements or concepts you agree with, you're going to dismiss the statements and concepts you disagree with.

Why do we do this process backwards like this?

We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success.
We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do.
And probably... he who never made a mistake, never made a discovery.
Samuel Smiles (1812 - 1904)

The truth is that most people don't know how they feel, what they want, or where they stand on most issues.

BUT (big but!)... people DO know what they disagree with; in other words they know "what will not do".

For the most part, people are usually sure about what they don't like, what they don't want, and what they disagree with.

So, we've used this natural mental default to make this entire process easier for you.

Simply read through the statements listed below, one by one, and dismiss the statement if you disagree with it.

Let me say this carefully again... your task is to REMOVE the statements you disagree with - and ignore the statements that you don't disagree with. It's a process of elimination in other words.

Don't worry about how much you agree with the statement, or not; focus ONLY on removing the statements that you immediately disagree with.

At the end, what you're left with will be the balance of the statements, and this will be used to generate a crafted statement for you.


How to use the Apology Statement Generator fields

Follow the instructions in the example fields below to learn how to use the Apology Statement Generator.

Remember that there are no right or wrong answers - just the information that you need to process.

You really can't get this wrong.

The questions will follow this format.

🗑 This is an example field. Click on the trashcan at the right of this block & watch me disappear.
🗑 This is another example field. Click on this wording & test the typing feature.
Any typing edits you make will be saved for you. This way, you are free to edit any of the statements to perfectly suit your individual situation.
🗑 Using conjunction words, like and, when & because, will you let you expand any statement, e.g. I am truly sorry I let you down and... or, I disappointed you because... or I let you down when...



Questions for the Apology Statement Generator


Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

Why are you doing this Apology Statement exercise?

🗑 I would like to apologize to you.
🗑 I would like to ask for your forgiveness.
🗑 I would like to make amends for my wrongdoing.

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

What are you apologizing for?

🗑 I regret my error in judgement.
🗑 I am sorry I lied to you.
🗑 I am sorry that my actions cheated you out of anything.
🗑 I apologize for betraying you.
🗑 I deeply regret betraying your trust.
🗑 I apologize if I have wronged you in any way, known or unknown.
🗑 I apologize for the mistakes I have made in the past.
🗑 I am aware of my mistakes and committed to rectifying them.
🗑 I apologize for dismissing you and your ideas.
🗑 I apologize for dismissing your needs and wants.
🗑 I deeply regret any incident where I belittled you - knowingly or unknowingly.
🗑 I apologize if you ever felt less important than me as a result of my actions.
🗑 I apologize for acting in a way that makes me seem superior.

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

How have you changed the relationship with this person?

🗑 Your faith in me is shaken.
🗑 Your faith in me is shattered.
🗑 I did not live up to your expectations.
🗑 I disappointed you.
🗑 I have broken your trust.
🗑 I have given you reason to doubt me.
🗑 I have threatened your security.
🗑 I have threatened the safety of our relationship.
🗑 I make you question whether you can trust my confidence.
🗑 I have made you question if you can trust me.
🗑 I have changed the dynamic of our relationship with my actions.
🗑 I have changed the way you view me.

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

How did you hurt or damage this person?

🗑 I made you feel judged.
🗑 I made you feel unimportant.
🗑 I made you feel that you have no value.
🗑 I made you angry.
🗑 I made you feel and face a whole bunch of fear.
🗑 I made you doubt yourself.
🗑 I caused you to doubt me.
🗑 I cast doubt on our relationship.
🗑 I've created resistance where previously we had flow.
🗑 I have caused you embarrassment.
🗑 I have caused you to feel humiliated.
🗑 I make you feel ashamed.
🗑 I made you feel insecure.
🗑 I threatened the security of our relationship.
🗑 I made you feel vulnerable.
🗑 I caused guilt that you have to live with.
🗑 I made you feel frustrated.
🗑 I caused you to feel stuck.
🗑 I made you jealous.
🗑 I tried to make you envious.
🗑 I was competing with you.
🗑 I put you up on a pedestal.
🗑 I wanted to knock you off your pedestal.

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

Do these actions accurately represent who you are?

🗑 I expect more from myself.
🗑 I have not lived up to my own expectations.
🗑 You expect more from me.
🗑 I have not lived up to your expectations.
🗑 I do not feel like a success in this regard.
🗑 I feel like a disappointment.
🗑 I would like to be proud of myself.
🗑 I would like us to take time to discuss how I disappointed you.
🗑 I want to ensure that I do not let you down again.

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

Could this situation have played out differently?

🗑 I did not know how to handle this situation.
🗑 I do not know how I could have handled this differently.
🗑 I have an idea of how I could have handled this differently.
🗑 I know how I should have handled this situation.
🗑 I would like to discuss alternative options for how I could have handled this with you.
🗑 I could or should have have handled this by...

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

What is needed in order to rebuild trust again?

🗑 What will it take for you trust me again?
🗑 What can I do to earn your trust?
🗑 What behaviors would you like to see from me?
🗑 What behaviors would you like me to stop?
🗑 How can I help you to feel safe?
🗑 What do I do that makes you feel safe?
🗑 What have I done in the past that made you feel safe?
🗑 What have others done in the past that made you feel safe?
🗑 Is there anything I can do to ensure that you know that I am truly remorseful for what I've done?
🗑 Do you need time alone?
🗑 Do we need to go away on a trip?
🗑 Do you need a formal apology?
🗑 Do you need me to apologize to anyone else like friends or family?
🗑 Would you like to enlist someone external to help us, like a healer, coach, counselor or therapist?
🗑 Would you like us to be more or less social over the next while?
🗑 Is there any other activity or event that you feel may help you?
🗑 Is there any day-to-day activity you would like me to avoid doing during this time of rebuilding trust?
🗑 Is there anyone you would like me to cease contact with?
🗑 We need to talk about this regularly in order to ensure that we deal with the issue over the long term. Would you like to schedule regular discussions or have me initiate a chat every few days, or do you prefer to take responsibility for initiating these discussions? Can we please define a regular interval by which each discussion must take place - say every five days?

For Intimacy & Couples

🗑 Will it help if I spend time cuddling with you?
🗑 How would you like me to handle physical contact?
🗑 How would you like me to handle sex and intimacy? Would you like me to initiate it?

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

What response do you want to this apology?

🗑 Please give me enough time to explain everything that happened in detail.
🗑 I promise to tell you the full story, without omitting any relevant facts.
🗑 Please ask me all the questions you have.
🗑 I will answer your questions in as much detail as possible.
🗑 I will answer honestly even if it makes me uncomfortable.
🗑 I hope that you will take some time to think about this before making a decision.
🗑 I hope that you will take a few days to think about this before making a decision.
🗑 I hope that we can discuss this in detail within the next 48 hours.
🗑 Can we set a time and place to meet and discuss this within 48 hours?

Read through the list of statements, and impulsively dismiss any of the statements that you disagree with.

The trick here is to move quickly and really be impulsive, so that you get a really honest read of where you stand. If you stop to ponder each point, your belief systems, and ideas about how things "should" be, will get in the way. So don't question why you want to dismiss the statement - just go with your gut feel.

You can also click on any statement & type to edit it.

Most importantly, what would you like this person to know?

🗑 I am deeply sorry for this.
🗑 I am deeply sorry for all of this.
🗑 I value your trust.
🗑 I am sorry that I have betrayed your trust.
🗑 This is not who I am or who I want to be.
🗑 Your opinion matters to me.
🗑 You matter to me.
🗑 It was never my intention to hurt you.
🗑 It was never my intention to disappoint you.
🗑 I truly hope that we are able to talk about this.
🗑 I hope that we can find a resolution and a way forward.
🗑 I value your presence in my life.
🗑 I love you.
🗑 I'm sorry. I love you. Please forgive me.

Edit, Refine & Finalize Your Apology Statement


Edit, Refine & Finalize Your Apology Statement

Now that you've worked through the various areas of focus, click the button below to GENERATE YOUR APOLOGY STATEMENT.

The Apology Statement will then appear below the buttons, and you'll have another chance to refine & edit your apology statement. Simply click anywhere to type additional points, or use the trash icon to delete that statement.

When you're finished your edits, hit MAKE PDF to save the statement to PDF. The PDF view that is generated will also be editable.

If your device doesn't support PDFs, or you'd like to save the content elsewhere, then use the COPY TO CLIPBOARD button and the content will be copied for you.

Use the buttons below to generate your Apology Statement.

🎨 GENERATE YOUR APOLOGY STATEMENT

🎠 MAKE PDF - ONLINE OR DESKTOP

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