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Life Coaches Toolbox by Chemory Gunko

Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness

💠 RELEASE YOUR LIMITING BELIEFS ABOUT FORGIVENESS 💠

How do your belief systems influence your ability to offer absolution or forgiveness?

  Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness

Often when we can't achieve forgiveness, it's because of a belief we carry around forgiveness.

If, for example, we believe that forgiving someone means we have to have a relationship with them, and we want the person out of our life, then it serves us not to forgive that person.

Look at the lists of statements below, regarding each belief. Impulsively delete the statements you disagree with.

Once you're done, the remaining statements will give you an idea of where that particular belief applies to you.

In most cases, recognizing these ideas will be enough to release them.

If that is not the case for you, then use the tool at the bottom of the page to burn the belief away.

PLEASE NOTE! The tabs with the questions below are a fixed height, and they scroll.

This is so that you always have the belief that the statements apply to in easy visual reference.


Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness Instructions & How To Guide

Follow the instructions in the example fields below to learn how to use the Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness Tool fields.

Notice how the content scrolls? The questions on the page all do that.

Remember that there are no right or wrong answers - just the information that you need to process.

There's no exam or score at the end of this. Just answer impulsively, because you really can't get this wrong.

🗑 This is an example field. Click on the trashcan at the right of this block & watch me disappear.
🗑 This is another example field. Click on this wording & test the typing feature.
Any typing edits you make will be saved for you. This way, you are free to edit any of the statements to perfectly suit your individual situation.
🗑 Using conjunction words, like and, when & because, will you let you expand any statement, e.g. I am truly sorry I let you down and... or, I disappointed you because... or I let you down when...

What Are Your Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness?


Forgiveness means that what they did is acceptable.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 If what they did is acceptable, then they aren't in the wrong, or to blame.
🗑 If what they did is acceptable, then they should be 'let off the hook'.
🗑 If what they did is acceptable, then I'm saying it's okay if this happens again.
🗑 I don't want to be thought of as a person who is capable of doing this.
🗑 I don't want to be associated with people who would do this.
🗑 I want everyone to know that this will always be unacceptable for me.
🗑 What happened is so bad that no one could ever accept it.
🗑 If I don't hang on to this, it's bound to happen again.
🗑 Other people will judge me for being okay with the situation if I forgive this person.
🗑 I can't bring myself to go anywhere near accepting this. This is entirely unacceptable - and unforgivable.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness means I have to let them back into my life.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I really don't want this person in my life.
🗑 My anger gives me a valid reason to cut this person off.
🗑 I've been looking for a way out of this relationship for a while.
🗑 I'm glad to be rid of this person.
🗑 I'm much happier without this person in my life.
🗑 Fighting with this person is a valid way to 'keep them' in my life.
🗑 It's easier to fight with and ignore this person than it is to put in effort with the relationship.
🗑 I feel like I need a reason in order to cut this person off.
🗑 I don't know how to end the relationship unless I"m angry at this person.
🗑 I'm trying to use anger to mask how much I miss & love this person.
🗑 I want this person back in my life, but I'm scared that they don't want me.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness means I have to see them & speak to them.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I'm embarrassed to face this person.
🗑 I feel ashamed about how I've been acting.
🗑 I don't know where to begin if I do see this person.
🗑 The thought of apologizing makes me sick to my stomach.
🗑 The thought of apologizing scares me senseless.
🗑 Nothing the person can say will make this better. Their apology will be of no value.
🗑 I'm so angry I might actually kill this person.
🗑 I don't want to say anything hurtful to this person.
🗑 I'm scared if I face them that the truth will come out.
🗑 I don't want to be subjected to how mean this person is.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness means that what happened to me doesn't matter.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 It always feels like I don't matter.
🗑 I can't take one more situation where my needs are ignored.
🗑 I'm putting my foot down with everyone who takes advantage of me.
🗑 I refuse to give anyone special treatment.
🗑 No one cares what happens to me. I have to look out for myself.
🗑 This person has repeatedly taken advantage of me.
🗑 I'm never going to allow anyone to do this to me again.
🗑 I'll never be taken for a ride again.
🗑 It's not worth it to trust anyone.
🗑 Everyone you love will betray you.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiving them means I will forget what happened.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 If I forget what happened, it will happen to me again.
🗑 This always happens to me - I've reached my breaking point.
🗑 This is the straw that broke the camel's back.
🗑 If I forget what happened, I will let this person back into my life.
🗑 Holding onto my anger is the only way I can stay away from this person.
🗑 I need a reason to get out of this relationship.
🗑 The situation that unfolded gives me power over this person. Letting go of my anger means losing my power in the relationship.
🗑 I enjoy being angry.
🗑 I want to have a reason to complain about this person.
🗑 I complain about everyone in my life.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

If I forgive this, it will happen to me again.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 If I forgive this, I have to let this person back into my life, and they'll just hurt me all over again.
🗑 This is part of long, ongoing cycle in my life.
🗑 This is regular pattern in this relationship, with this person.
🗑 Every time this happens, it causes huge drama. I'm tired of the drama.
🗑 Staying angry, or near anger, stops the person from engaging in this behavior.
🗑 It will break me to go through this again.
🗑 When I've forgiven this in the past, it's blown up in my face again.
🗑 Holding onto my anger keeps me vigilant & focused: on the look out for any small sign that this may be starting up again.
🗑 I feel like I have to be a parent or role model to this person.
🗑 I need to teach this person a lesson they will never forget.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness absolves them of blame.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 This person deserves to be punished for what they did.
🗑 This is a regular pattern in this person, and this crash has been a long time coming. They deserve to learn a lesson they will never forget.
🗑 I see no other way to get this person to change their behavior.
🗑 I feel disappointed by this person not living up to my expectations.
🗑 This is not who I thought this person is.
🗑 I am disappointed, angry or embarrassed that I did not see this sooner.
🗑 I feel like an idiot for being blind to this for so long.
🗑 This made me look stupid, and embarrassed me.
🗑 I'm ashamed that other people will discover my humiliation.
🗑 What happened challenges my ideas of who I am.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Some things are unforgivable.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I could never accept being connected to someone who could do this.
🗑 I'm ashamed to be associated with this person.
🗑 I'm embarrassed that this person is associated to me.
🗑 I never thought something like this would happen to me.
🗑 I feel stupid for not seeing this earlier.
🗑 I had a hunch something was wrong, but I ignored it.
🗑 Nobody would understand if I forgive this.
🗑 I'm still in shock about what happened.
🗑 I could not live with myself I forgave this.
🗑 I do not ever want to forget about this.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Someone needs to be to blame. Someone needs to take responsibility.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 If it isn't the other person's fault, then it must be mine.
🗑 I'm angry at them because I'm blameless.
🗑 Being in the role of the victim rewards me with people's time, attention, leniency, compassion and more.
🗑 Someone has to pay for this.
🗑 This hurt me so badly that I want to spread that hurt around.
🗑 This has happened to me over and over again in my life.
🗑 I won't let go of this until I'm sure my next relationship is safe from this energy.
🗑 I've built my identity around this.
🗑 I've held onto this for so long that I don't know how to let go of it.
🗑 I have a pattern of blaming others.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness is outside my power.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I don't know where to begin forgiving this - or anything else.
🗑 Forgiveness is a religious thing and I don't go to church.
🗑 Forgiveness is a spiritual thing and I'm not spiritual.
🗑 It's impossible to change how you feel. Emotions are something that happen to you.
🗑 You can't get better at something like forgiveness. You can either do it or not.
🗑 Forgiving people are weak; pushovers.
🗑 Forgiveness is a sign of weakness.
🗑 No Higher Power would ever help me to achieve forgiveness.
🗑 Forgiveness won't change anything.
🗑 People who say they've forgiven something are lying.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Forgiveness only benefits the Other Person.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 There's no benefit for me in forgiving this person.
🗑 When I think angry thoughts about them, it hurts them somehow.
🗑 This person does not deserve anyone's forgiveness.
🗑 This person doesn't deserve anything good.
🗑 This person needs to know how they affect other people.
🗑 This person gets away with everything.
🗑 I've always taken second place to this person and their needs.
🗑 It's time my needs & wants were acknowledged.
🗑 It's time that somebody put me first.
🗑 I've done more than enough compromising.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

I've never forgiven anyone.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I'm still angry about everything bad that has ever happened to me.
🗑 I hold onto grudges forever.
🗑 I only ever think angry thoughts.
🗑 I complain all the time.
🗑 I believe in 'justice', 'karma', revenge & vengeance.
🗑 I believe that other people deserve to be punished.
🗑 I plot ways that I will get my revenge on someone.
🗑 I've never gotten over anything.
🗑 I've never had a fight with anyone close to me.
🗑 I have nobody in my life.
🗑 I am angry at everyone in my life.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

My forgiveness means nothing. It is of no value.

Thoughts specific to this belief.

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've never had a friend or family, or anyone else, apologize to me for anything - no matter how small.
🗑 No one has ever apologized to me for bumping into me in a public place.
🗑 I've never been able to salvage a relationship after a fight.
🗑 No one has ever confessed something they did wrong to me.
🗑 The only forgiveness comes from the church.
🗑 Forgiveness is given to you - you can't make it happen.
🗑 Forgiveness is a natural process that happens inside you & you can't control it.
🗑 No one cares what I think anyway.
🗑 I'm always the victim.
🗑 God/Source/Life/The Universe is punishing me.

Where did this belief come from?

Remember to delete the statements that do NOT apply.

🗑 I've always believed this.
🗑 I've never questioned this belief.
🗑 I assume other people believe this is true.
🗑 I assume other people expect this of me.
🗑 My family believes this.
🗑 My friends believe this.
🗑 I think society believes this.
🗑 This is what is expected of me.
🗑 My family expects this of me.
🗑 I expect this of myself.
🗑 I expect this of others.
🗑 This is how I want to be treated.
🗑 I want this to be true if I forgive someone.
🗑 I want this to be true if someone forgives me.
🗑 My religion expects this of me.
🗑 My Higher Power expects this of me.
🗑 I believe my spirituality demands this.
🗑 I have not truly forgiven someone if this isn't true.
🗑 I don't have any idea where this comes from.
🗑 Other

Release Your Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness


Release Your Limiting Beliefs About Forgiveness Tool

Scroll up and select the belief you want to work on.

Using the tool below, upload a picture that represents your limiting belief.

Take your time finding a picture that really represents the belief for you. The reason will 'speak' to you, is because it closely matches the picture in your mind.

So the more the 'feels' right, the more powerful this exercise will be.

Go back and read over the remaining statements that you did not delete.

Read the group of information a few times and really try to connect to it: maybe listing examples from your own experience that prove the points.

If you deleted all the statements in a belief set, the it's safe to assume that belief doesn't apply to you very much - if at all.

Now, say the word statement of the belief out loud three times, e.g. Forgiveness means I have to let this person back into my life.

Then, when you are ready, click to release the belief, and watch it burn away forever.

To really reinforce that it's gone, spend the next couple of WEEKS (as in 14 days or longer!) looking for proof of HOW you have changed because this belief has shifted.

This is how you 'act as-if' the change has already taken place.





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